3 Ways To Get More Love in Your Life

A big theme for me in the first half of 2018 has been "Lead With Love". It's plastered on my vision board and can be found on little heart-shaped sticky notes throughout the house along with "Create",  "Soul-Driven Hustle", and "Peace".  But L.O.V.E. has definitely been my driving force. The one-word mantra I can default to in an instant no matter what's going on around me.

Why Love? Because we are in dire need of it. And the only way to get it is to give it. I've been grieving the passing of my rescue pup of 9 years this past weekend. Needless to say, I've been low energy and kinda quick to snap. A dear friend recently said, "Ryann, the easiest way to get into the state that you want to be in {love} is to make someone else feel that way." Yes. YES. All the yeses. The only way we can attract more love into our life is by projecting it. Here are three go-to's for when we're feeling less-than-loving:


1. Get Pissed then Take Action

It used to drive me crazy when I saw garbage on the beach. For a long time, I would walk by and go, "Who the hell is littering? Where's this crap coming from?". I was pissed off but that was it. I decided to learn from my frustration and take it a step further to define a positive action that would get me into a more loving state. Now I pick up trash when I walk on the beach--it's literally that simple. No matter what pisses you off. You name it. Get pissed, be aware, then take action. Insta-love, people. 

2. Smile at a Stranger


I can't tell you how many times I used to walk down the street and wonder why everyone looked so pissed off.  It's because I was getting back exactly what I was putting out. I wasn't stopping to say "Hello" or "Good Morning" so, naturally, neither were they. In a time when "stranger danger" can feel like a real threat, it's important we remember the beauty in humanity. That we see the sun peeking through the clouds. To know that people are inherently good. Plus, one smile could literally change someone's day--and definitely your own. 

3. Turn Negativity into an Affirmation

We've all been there. That meeting that turns into a total shit-show or a discussion with a friend or partner that turns into a full-blown argument. You know, those that-escalated-quickly moments. When we are knee-deep in a negative space instead of getting caught up and boarding the negativity-train, we can practice awareness of our thoughts which helps us respond constructively. 

I went to the dentist recently to get my teeth cleaned and while sitting in the chair, interrogation light beaming down at my face, mouth propped all the way open, I couldn't help but think, "This sucks. It's annoying. There are 55 other things I could be doing." I immediately caught the negative thought and silently thanked my hygienist for being so interested in teeth that he decided to go to school and make a career out of it. I mean seriously,  how lucky are we? Modern, first-world conveniences much? When we notice ourselves getting caught up in a negativity-party-of-one (or many!) we can create a loving affirmation to feel the love instead. It's a game-changer. 


Our days start to look a lot different when we practice leading with love. And if we want to take it a step further, the only way we can effect positive change in the World is through love. Not by angrily expressing our egotistical opinions. Not by bashing whichever political party is not ours. Not by flicking someone off because they are driving too slow or too fast. Or idly sitting by as we watch horrific things like the water crisis in Africa, children being ripped from their parents at the U.S. border, or the circus that is 24-hour non-stop "news".  

Actually, just writing about these issues kinda makes me want to jump back into bed and pull the covers over my head. Truth is, I've been pulling the covers up and over my head for way too long and I've finally realized that doesn't change anything. It doesn't solve the water crisis or end human trafficking or ensure the safety of our freedom. Most importantly, it doesn't take any courage to hide from the things that break our heart.  

Here's to stepping into our courage and being the change we want to see in this World.